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Emotional Damage: Preparing for the Bar Exam
Why the bar exam so difficult? It’s stressful, emotionally draining, and usually makes those studying a ball of frustration and anxiety. Why? Over one exam?! I’ve shared before that the summer I studied for the Bar, was beyond stressful. I did nothing but study for 12-14 hours a day, freaking out every day that I was going to fail, and on exam day when I read the first question I was -literally-embarassed at how much I had freaked out because the test was just like my law school exams. Duh. That’s what everyone who had taken the test said, but I just couldn’t believe them. So I know that in…
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Who are You to Judge? Managing Feelings Around Clients
You’re not going to like your clients. Well, you’ll like some of them but more than likely you’ll have a few that you just don’t like. It could be because of their personality or because of their decisions, or because they zap your energy, or they’re downright rude…clients are humans and we normally don’t always love every human we engage with. But when you’re representing them, you’re duty to your client requires you figuring out how to overcome feelings of dislike. Now to be clear, there’s no duty to like your client. But when you dislike someone or find yourself judging their behavior/character, it impacts your work and that is…
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Three Gentle Truths to Remember A Month Before the Bar Exam
“It’s going to be the worst summer of your life,” that’s what my trust and estates prof told me one night when our class went out with some professors. She made me so scared for bar prep–here I was a barely making it by as a student (at least that was the vision I had of myself) and here she was, this super successful professor telling me it was going to be horrible. If it was horrible for her, how could I make it? I don’t begrudge the professor’s blunt warning because it did help me prepare for a mental storm that many of us experience during Bar prep. And…
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Managing Angry & Volatile Clients
One thing they don’t teach you in law school is how to respond when you think a client is going to harm you. Hopefully you never need to know that, but reading a recent article of an immigration attorney who was stabbed by their client, it dawned on me how necessary it is to talk about managing experiences with volatile clients in order to keep yourself safe. First, I don’t want to talk about this to instill fear in people or make lawyering seem overly dangerous. However, in one study of 22 states, it found that up to 46.5% of registered attorneys had been threatened or assaulted. It helps no…
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Two Years Later…
Two years go by so fast that you don’t even notice how things change. I want to take some time to reflect on the past two years (times BC) because I think it’s important and also because, in general, people are so quick to dismiss the trauma and the shift we’ve experienced and that’s not healthy, bestie. First, and most important, there are so many people whose lives were upended because of this illness (to put it lightly). And as a country we’re really quick to overlook the loss of millions of people gone and what that means. I don’t have any solutions on how to make us more empathetic…
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The Magic and Panic of Post-Bar Life
If you took the February Bar, I have one thing to say–CONGRATULATIONS! YOU DID IT! Ok, I actually have more than one thing to say (obvi). It is such a relief to be done but the reality is that even after putting in all that work, you don’t know the results for weeks and the anxiety of what if can really drag you down. Life post-bar is filled with both the magic of what is possible–your entire career ahead of you. And the panic, “what if I didn’t pass?” It’s a horrible predicament. I remember, still, the weeks after the test where I’d have moments so excited about what…
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Don’t let law school take your joy!
Around this time each year I share this post. But a lot of time has passed since the original and I thought an update was warranted. For law students, as you try to enjoy your time off, I know that for many there will be a little voice in your head reminding you about your grades. And reminding you about a tough question and how you’re not sure about your answer. Or you’ll agonize over the question you didn’t get to because of time… What if your grades are bad? What if you don’t grade on to journal? What if you can’t apply to the job you want? It’s nerve-wracking!…
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My Nightstand Routine
The thing about me is that I love routines. And routines within routines? Omg, forget it! I think the stability of it really scratches some itch in my brain. So of course, I have a nightstand routine that I totally recommend. What is a nightstand routine? It’s simply items I keep on hand that I use before bed but if you’re a night owl, like me, then little things that help my brain underscore that it’s time for sleep help me not just scroll on my phone until 1 am (which of course I never do 😬). Here is what I keep on hand: St. Jane’s Body Serum. This…
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Easing Back to the Office
I know the idea of going back to the office strikes fear in a lot of us but it is likely many will be easing back into a hybrid or a new routine where you are back in the office full time (I don’t wish this on you, unless you really want it!). Seeing as I’ve been back since July (yes, five days a week!), I wanted to share some things that made the transition easier for me. Because there is a shift in terms of time, attention, and energy that comes with being away from home 9-5 and it’s nice to be prepared for it. First, working from home…
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Proud of You! Recognizing Your Accomplishments During Difficult Times
We talk a lot about stress and frustrating aspects about this work or school because it’s important to dissect that and figure out solutions. We’ve also all gone through two really tough years that includes loss in different areas of life. I know it’s easy to end this year by just steeling ourselves for whatever’s to come but I think that would be a slight disservice to ourselves. Instead, I want us to wind down the year recognizing all the great things we accomplished. Ok, caveat, I’m the last person to lean into posi vibes only–I literally wince when we have to do calming techniques or centering exercises during workshops…